Question: My family introduced me to a blind date. They are quite satisfied with her and we both know her well. But I just don’t have feelings for her. Should I continue?
At first, the two of us had a pretty good chat, but gradually we got to know each other and found that our personalities were not suitable. My personality is relatively introverted, and later I found that she was too. When we go out together, we basically There was nothing to say, and most of the time it was silence.
My parents may be a little anxious because I haven’t found a girlfriend, so they are relatively satisfied with her. My dad always thinks it’s me and tells me not to be too self-righteous. I am very good, but I still dislike others and say things that hurt my heart. But I have never disliked her. I really just felt it was inappropriate. Now I am almost depressed because of the pressure from my family.
How should I tell my blind date that I am inappropriate?
Answer: In fact, what you say is inappropriate does not necessarily mean that it is inappropriate. You are saying it is inappropriate before you even start, and it has no reference value at all.
According to what you said: You had a good chat at the beginning. Maybe both of you were pretending to be talkative at the beginning, or maybe you added a filter to the other person and only saw an illusion. Through the gradual contact, I found that the two people were silent most of the time. Maybe you are too lazy to pretend and show yourself in your natural and true state. I think it just shows that you have entered a new stage. But you think it's "not the right personality". So, what you're saying is that you're actually looking for an extrovert?
But according to my understanding, extroverts may not necessarily want to find an introverted partner who is just their listener; and as an introvert, do you think you can hold an extroverted partner?
So I think that since you and the girl you are dating feel comfortable chatting with each other at the beginning, it means that through your own efforts, you can still communicate smoothly. It just depends on whether you are willing to work for it.
And if she is really that kind of radiant extrovert, do you think it will still be your turn? In other words, if you find a girl who has average conditions but is very good at flirting with you and tricking your dad, is that the "feeling" you want to pursue? By then you have real problems to worry about.
If this girl is really not bad, but you feel it’s boring to have nothing to say, you can try to make some changes, such as Say you want to go back to the way it was when you started talking. Many times when chatting, the more you talk, the more you want to talk. It requires two people to work together.
It is recommended that you think carefully before you go to a blind date girl and say that she is not suitable. After all, it may not be possible after you say it. Give it a try and see if she is the right person.
